I may have mentioned this before, but moving away kind of sucks.
Nobody realizes it until it's already upon them, but it means packing up everything you'll need at your new location, giving up the four walls of your bedroom (think of all the memories in that room alone), and finding some way to say goodbye to all the people who ever meant something to you. It's hard. [And when you have three quarters of a marching band who're rather fond of you, it can get REALLY interesting.] Granted, once you've marched with someone, you share a pretty strong bond, but geography doesn't change to suit the needs of the people you knew in high school. Yes, I'm going to miss my trumpet brethren, and yes, I'll miss all my band friends, but it's not like there's an option where I get to go to college in Arizona while being in California every day to ask them how their day went. And while not being there for them is as hard for me as it is for them, I have so much other stuff on my plate that to them it might seem like I'm being distant. I'm not. I'm just juggling packing, finding all the music stuff I really can't live without, studying for theory placement, practicing for my piano and trumpet placements, cleaning (out) my room, trying to spend time with my parents and brother, and preserving the shreds of sanity a select few claim I actually retain.
On the flip side, thanks to social networking, I've found that I'm communicating a lot more with both my friends from out of state (quickly rising through the ranks of close friends is a trombone player from the Midwest) and the handful of new friends I'll be joining at ASU. I'm not sure if I need company because all my high school friends have started school or I'm just missing them, but it's nice to be able to reconnect (or connect for the first time).
I leave town tomorrow, and yesterday I had both my last composition lesson and my last trumpet lesson. Both my instructors are great guys, and it makes me sad that I'm closing the door on this chapter of both my life and my musicianship. Sure, I'm excited about getting better at my craft in college, but my private instructors made a huge difference in my life, and I'm proud to have had the privilege of being their student.
As for today... Plans are tentative at best. I might get lunch with a good friend, and I'm hoping to swing by my high school after they get out so I can give some final hugs and well-wishes. I'm not going to see these guys again until October, so I have a feeling there might be LOTS of hugging. And yes, I'll probably drop in on a few of my favorite teachers.
I'm going to quote Castle again, because in all the goodbyes and the commotion, I've been trying to keep in mind that no matter what happens around me, I need to stay focused on achieving what I want from life.
"Ten years I've been keeping them company, while they spend a night or two here on their way to where we're all going. They all had plans - things they were going to do when they got around to it. Go on a cruise, lose ten pounds, fall in love... They thought they had all the time in the world, but nobody does."
Yes, it was a conversation in a morgue, but the point is pretty clear: life is short. Don't waste your time wondering about what could have been or what another person might be thinking. Act on your beliefs and don't let obstacles slow you down. When something goes wrong, heal and move on. Hopefully that can be my college mantra... We'll have to wait and see.
Love you all,
Megan
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